Fear Not

There are a lot of unknowns when preparing for adoption, which for me can create anxiety and fear. What if our paperwork isn't sealed before expiration? What if we are not approved for the child with which we're matched? What if our child struggles to bond with us? How will we discuss adoption and birth parents? What behavioral issues will our child suffer from living in an orphanage? Will our child resent being removed from his/her birth country and culture? How will our community receive our blended family? How will I care for two children when I can barely keep up with one?!

Some days I just have to sit back, try to relax, and listen to this song...

Your grace abounds in deepest waters

Your sovereign hand will be my guide

Where feet may fail and fear surrounds me

You've never failed and you won't start now

Hillsong UNITED Oceans (Where Feet May Fail) Lyric Video

God reminds us over and over again not to depend solely on people, things, or situations but to instead rely on Him. The command repeated more in the Bible than any other is "Fear not." Let's reflect on these verses today. I'm betting you could use some strength and peace today too.

"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous hand."
Isaiah 41:10

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7

Statistics FYI

Just to give you a glimpse of CCAI's monthly adoption statistics...
In the month of February, 32 waiting children (15 girls and 17 boys) were matched with CCAI families. Thirty of those children were from CCAI's agency-specific list (from the orphanages they support) and 2 were from the CCCWA's shared list. Of the 32 children, 7 have cleft lip/palate. Three children are under twelve months old and 12 children are 12-24 months old.
Thirty six waiting children were matched in January and 52 waiting children were matched in December. Three non-special needs children were matched in December 2014 with families that logged in dossiers in December 2006. That's a very long time to wait for a match. I'm so thankful for the waiting child list! I cannot wait to finish our paperwork and log in our dossier with China. Then we wait for a file, a boy or girl that will join our family forever!

Kings & Queens

The other day I started thinking that in twelve months we could be adopting a twelve month old. Today could be my child's birthday! Typically this is a day of joy, excitement, and celebration. Family gathering around to welcome a new member. Friends sending notes of congratulations. Pictures taken as memories are made. But for many this is a dreadful day, such as when a baby is born too soon or born with a lethal condition. In places without proper healthcare, even minor congenital anomalies can be a big deal.

This makes me think about my future child's birth mother. Was she able to receive the prenatal care that I took for granted? Did she find out about her child's condition on ultrasound? Was she conflicted about continuing the pregnancy knowing she couldn't provide the necessary surgery? Did she cry everyday worrying about the baby's future? Or maybe she didn't see it coming. Maybe after months of preparation and hours of painful labor, the best moment of her life turned into the saddest. The healthy baby she hoped for requires care she can't provide. Her heart must be broken. I cannot imagine the overpowering rush of hormones and mixed emotions. Unlike Moses mother, she cannot send the baby away and then still become the caretaker. She cannot watch the baby grow up from afar. She cannot leave any trace of identity or lineage. She may never know what happens to her child.

I wish I could be there during her disappointment and sorrow to tell her this baby still has a bright future. That even though she will abandon her baby, someone will come along to love and provide for that child. I don't think this would actually make her decision easier as I could not fathom giving up a baby. Giving up a son or daughter that I carried in my heart, in my belly, and in my arms. I look forward to adopting this child and continuing the mother's love. A love strong enough to give life. I will make sure this child knows how much two mothers have loved him/her. I believe that adoption provides hope to mothers in crisis, care to children in need, and joy to families everywhere. My motivation is my love for all three. 

Won't you look around, these are the lives the world has forgotten

Waiting for doors of our hearts and our homes to open

Boys become kings, girls become queens

Wrapped in your majesty, when we love the least of these

Then they will be brave and free, shout your name in victory

Audio Adrenaline - Kings & Queens

Their smiles are infectious!

Keep in Mind

During the adoption process, the wait seems endless and the paperwork so tedious. Around every corner is another obstacle to overcome and another payment to be made. Add all of this up and the sum is typically frustration and exhaustion. But then someone offers a glimpse of hope. A successful adoption story from a friend, patient, or CCAI reference. These stories remind me of why we started this journey... for the child on the other end. Not just any child, but the child chosen to join our family forever. The child chosen to become part of our legacy. A human being with little fingers and toes, emotions and personality, hopes and needs. A little one that will call us Dad and Mom. 

The new Dad in this adoption story understands, especially after holding his child. He says "We prayed for a child. In our prayers, there wasn't a face. There wasn't a name. We were just asking for a child. It wasn't just a child God intended to bring into our family... All that waiting, all those prayers were for Jacob, for our son." Like this Dad, we also hope that God will be glorified through our child's story. A story of perseverance, passion, and providence inspiring him/herself and others. 

http://virantee.com/baby-abandoned-nameless-miracle/

Papers, Papers, & More Papers!

"There's no space that His love can't reach
There's no place where we can't find peace
There's no end to amazing grace

Take me in with Your arms spread wide
Take me in like an orphan child
Never let go, Never leave my side"

Crowder - I Am (Lyric Video)

Adoption involves a lot of paperwork and "sealing" documents through an authentication process. First I obtained certified copies of our birth certificates and marriage certificate. Then I learned that I also needed to obtain a Triple Seal Page to accompany the certified marriage certificate. I mailed these documents to the Secretary of State offices in KY and VA for further certification. We created an Adoption Petition and Financial Statement then obtained Employment Verifications for each of us. We also required physical exams to complete our health forms. Each of these documents had to be notarized and then must be sealed within 6 months of the earliest date on the page. Yesterday, I mailed the documents to the NC Secretary of State Office for certification. The next step in authentication is the Department of State Authentications Office and the final step is the Chinese Embassy in Washington DC. Please pray that all of our documents pass inspection and make it back home safely after each mailing!

Beginning the Journey

"He cares for the orphans." -Psalm 146:9

The longing for this journey began many years ago in a little girl's heart. I was introduced to the concept of adoption from China by a couple in my church. I was an adolescent, wanting to belong and be loved. I was horrified that little girls on the other side of the world were being abandoned solely for being female. I hoped that some day I would bring home one of those orphaned children to love. Every child deserves the warm embrace of a parent, hugs from family, and a sense of belonging in a community. After reading about the lack of nutrition, medicine, heat, and staff in orphanages, Phillip was fully on board with providing a forever home to a child in need. We are so excited for the opportunity to care for another child and add to our family!

Last summer Phillip and I started researching adoption agencies. We chose Chinese Children Adoption International for their passion, dedication, and experience. CCAI has been ranked #1 by the China Center for Children's Welfare and Adoption. CCAI has found homes for more than 11,000 children since 1992. We signed our contracts with CCAI in October and began the long paper chase. Phillip and I are participating in the Waiting Child Program. Many children are orphaned in China due to the lack of healthcare and inaccessibility to surgery/therapy. We completed our Medical Conditions Checklist to include surgically repairable conditions such as cleft lip/palate, club foot, and hernia. At first we selected preference for female, but then we found out that 60% of Chinese orphans are boys! I thought we would be bringing equality and love to a little girl's life. However, Phillip and I couldn't imagine leaving a little boy behind just because he was male. So we changed our list to no gender preference. We're sure God already has our next child in mind and we can't wait to meet him/her!
Phillip and I are working with Children's Home Society of NC for our home study. A home study is an assessment of prospective adoptive parents to see if they are suitable for adopting a child. During meetings with our social worker, she asked questions about how we met, our marriage, our families, and more. We are currently waiting for the final draft of the home study report.

For more info about Chinese Children Adoption International, visit CCAIfamily.org